Sometimes I forget

In life, it is easy to lose focus on what everything is about. It is easy to get wrapped up in life's constant twists and loops that truly important things get swept to the side. Right now, in life, I am trying to figure out the direction I want to take in life. I want to start growing up and doing more than I am doing. However, I do not know what this looks like. I heard a quote that said "Not all that wander are lost." I don't think that applied to me. In an earlier post, I talked about how I think God has me here for a reason that I don't know and I think He is waiting on me to be patient and content. Sometimes I forget that ultimately He is in control and the more I try to go against my own advice, the more lost I become and I wander ever farther. I keep pushing myself farther and farther away and feel so inadequate. It is a terrible feeling. The worst part is I know it and continue to do it. It is like I know the stove is hot and I continue to put my hand on it! WTF am I thinking? I need more focus in life right now... I want to be able to see life the way I used to see it... I want to make a difference... But I can't because I can't even do anything right in my own life.. I am a wreck.. However, I know that I don't have to do it alone.. Hide me in the shadow of your Wings